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Marriage: A school of learning and discovery.

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on: September 22, 2018, 09:49:03 PM
By Pastor Okokon Ating

 I have been enlightened that marriage is an institution established by God which no student has graduated from. Once an individual is able to obtain admission into this school, one keeps on learning till death. In the school of marriage every student is a novice. No matter how highly educated one is, he/she has a blank knowledge compared with the normal academic attainment.
There are many mysteries embedded in marriage unknown to the unlearned heart. Couples do not know marriage but learn and study it. That is, couples learn and study it when they come into the practical aspect of it. I came in contact with a young lady who was busy attending marriage seminars and reading several books on marriage. Attending seminars and reading books on marriage are good, I told her; but where you can know and be proud of living confidently in marriage is when you enter into the reality of marriage. This is when one is involved in the very act where you are faced with challenges to handle, and successfully resolving it without a crash. Some people quickly opt out because they are unable to face certain consequences and adjust to it.   Jesus said in Matthew 7:24-28 that, it is those who hear and do what God says that are being compared with the house built on a rock which the storm and rain cannot bring down. There are many people who have been in marriage and have seldom been influenced positively by it.  Undeniably, it is not the day one resumes at school that one is able to assimilate everything. Such a one must pass through various grades and styles of learning before one could attain graduation. As it is in elementary school where a child begins to learn recognizing and identifying alphabets, how to form two or more letter words and so on, before being able to read them, likewise it is in marriage. There are elementary rudiments and rules one must learn to adapt, which if not such marriage stands in danger of falling apart.  We learn in marriage and ought to know this learning is on a daily basis. As you continue in marriage so you’ll realize some undiscovered character which was hidden at a time such marriage was contracted. I know of a father who was a pastor as far back as 1985. He told me and other young pastors that, it has taken him and his wife much to cause their marriage to stand for 30 years without breaking. The reason being that, the wife understood him soon enough and bore the responsibility for his mistakes and weaknesses till such number of years. At the time Baba understood Mama’s personality, he has become old and regretted maltreating Mama for so many years. According to Isaiah 11:2-3, “The spirit of the Lord shall rest upon Him, the spirit of wisdom and understanding, the spirit of counsel and might, the spirit of knowledge and of fear of the Lord; and shall make him of quick understanding in the fear of the Lord: he shall not judge after the sight of his eyes, neither reprove after the hearing of his ears.